revisiting the dark

when i am sitting cross-legged on the floor
rocking so hard to keep the light and the sound out
rocking so hard to keep the beat of my heart at bay
rocking so hard that i can’t get the bullet into the chamber
my tears have wet my fingers
my sobs wrack and shake my body over the rocking
when i am 38 seconds from my ending…

i am closer to the light than that

glb /// “revisiting the dark”
originally published 02/09/2014