The Light From Your Eyes

I don’t want to ever forget
Your face in my hands as
You look up into my eyes
Right before I kiss you
I ache at the touch
Of your lips
They are so sweet but
I just want to pull away
So I can look into your
Radiant eyes and watch
Your tongue dart out in
Preparation for another
Somehow that memory
Is always with me
Like it happened mere
Seconds ago
Though it was lifetimes
I can still feel the light
From your eyes

— GB

Walls of My Imagination

Light is fading from my eyes
The sky is a beautiful blue
But I am failing to see it completely
You paint a brilliant picture
On the walls of my imagination
Impossible if I had never
Encountered it before
I add you to the picture
So I may recall my two favorite
Things once the darkness
Has come completely

— GB

A Bug

A bug just ran up my arm, not a real bug, mind you, this one was generated inside my cranium…

That’s a new development.  I wonder what brought that on, maybe the Abilify has started to lose some of it’s efficacy, I was taking it for more than being and addition to my anti-depressant.  It is, first and foremost, an anti-psychotic.  Maybe I should turn some lights on in here.  These things like to attack in from the shadows.  This is the first time in a very long while that I have had a hallucination that actually touched my body.  They usually are just in my vision and then, poof, they’re gone.  This one appeared on my wrist, like it came from under the keyboard, and ran up my arm until it disappeared under my sleeve (at my elbow).  It looked like a spider but I couldn’t really tell, it was graying-black, about the size of a pencil eraser (#2 wooden pencil).

Luckily, I see my psych-doc tomorrow.  I definitely need to talk to him about this.  Hopefully we can come up with a good treatment plan that doesn’t involve ECT.  I would really, really, really like to avoid ECT.  I have to say here, that it is not a fear of ECT as much as it is a desire to stay out of the Psych Hospital.  Here, where I live, ECT requires being in-patient.

But that is not what this is about.
I saw a bug on my arm, that wasn’t there and I’m going to talk to my doc about it tomorrow.  In the mean time, I’m going to turn on a light.

closed eyes

light in my closed eyes feels red
brings words pushing through my lips
yelling at the light to stop shining
I can’t get you off of my taste buds
you enchant the word with your every move
abracadabra I wanna reach out and
spin you around until stardust flies
out of your eyes and onto my table
where I can write your name then
puff it away to fly out to the universe
where the sun will never stop shining
and your radiance will never stop
making my closed eyes feel red

— GB

lost in you

there’s some music
comin’ outta that box
makes me tap my toe
makes me wanna take
your hand and dance
like the night won’t end,
so I do, and the evening
lights up, lights in the
trees reflect in your
eyes, glow on your hair,
makes me wanna slow
dance, just for a bit,
pull you close, breathe
in the scent from your
hair, I am lost in you…

— GB